I was recently flipping through the channels and stumbled upon the Arsenio Hall Show. First let me ask, did I take a time machine back to the 90’s? When did Arsenio Hall get a show? Anyway, this comedian was on named Chris Spencer. I had never heard of him before, but I was pulled in by his dialogue about his kids. It was almost as if he was describing my own two little bundles of joy!

It amazes me every day by how much two people can fight from the minute they open their eyes to the minute they are closed again. Yet, when we purposely separate them, they are begging to see the other within minutes. Here is their story.

 

 

The Hater and The Snitch

 

“Little Ricky” is The Hater. No matter what his brother says, he has a negative spin to put on it.

 

“The Nag”: Mommy I got a 95% on my math test!!

Me: That’s great! I’m so happy!

“Little Ricky”: So what? It’s not 100%.

Me: (side eye to “Little Ricky.”)

 

Getting in the car after football camp:

“The Nag”: Mommy, I got 3rd place in the ladder drills. I’m getting a trophy on Friday!

Me: Wow!! I’m so proud of you!

“Little Ricky”: Well, my team kicked his team’s butt in the game.

Me: (Face palm)

 

 

“The Nag” is The Snitch. He purposely tells on his brother, but in a non-direct kind of way. So passive aggressive!

 

“The Nag”: Hey mommy, didn’t you say we weren’t allowed to eat a snack? (as he looks in the direction of his brother sneaking a snack.)

 

As the two boys are in the other room playing a video game:

“The Nag”: (Louder than necessary) Ow! Why did you hit me?

“Little Ricky”: It was an accident.

“The Nag”: (coming into the kitchen holding his arm) Ow…Ow…Ow (until I ask what’s wrong)

 

 

Seriously? What have I done to deserve this??